We are now in the height of summer and the temperatures have soared, breaking records as the hottest summer since 1976, fifty years ago! That was the year of my O’levels (now GCSE’s). That summer I did all my revising outside alternating between sunbathing and seeking shade from the heat of the day. As we’ve all been trying to keep cool, I have had further news on my cancer treatment.
My oncologist decided that as I’d had successful surgery to remove the nodule, that they would instigate ‘watchful waiting’. For me, this means three monthly CT scans and six weekly blood tests. The cancer marker in my blood had returned to its normal low-level. But this marker is only one indicator of cancer and it is the scans that can give a more accurate picture – as I like to think, they are the ‘eyes that see inside’.
Up until now I’ve talked about oncologists, plastic surgeons, microbiologists and specialist nurses but I haven’t mentioned radiologists. My introduction to the power of imaging was when I had my first Xray at about eight years old. I had been sitting high up on the cross bar of our garden swing and somehow lost my balance. I instinctively put my arm out to break my fall and it immediately snapped! I knew it was broken as the bone was pushing out the skin making my arm a strange shape. The Xray confirmed it.
Since those early years, I’ve had ultrasound scans, mammograms, CT scans, MRI scans and one PET scan. It was a radiologist who first diagnosed I had cancer. I had had a blood test which indicated that I might have cancer, but it was the CT scan that confirmed it. The pictures were so clear. There was no mistake! Since that difficult day, I have come to appreciate the skill of these doctors whose machines give them eyes to see what’s actually happening inside my body. They’ve also cared for me in doing biopsies, placing guide wires to pinpoint an area for surgery and draining infections from inside my body. All essential for diagnoses, successful surgery and ultimately, saving lives.
My first CT scan in this period of ‘watchful waiting’ gave the radiologists cause for concern and they recommended I have an MRI scan. They were seeing some indication of suspicious tissue around the recent surgery site and wanted to see if it was scar tissue or cancerous tissue. The MRI scan confirmed that cancer has returned to the surgery site. It was very hard news to hear. My first question to my oncologist was, ‘What’s the plan then?’ He said that he wasn’t going to put me back on chemotherapy due to the fact that the ovarian cancer (silently present) hadn’t responded to the chemotherapy I had had in September and October last year. He thinks I have become resistant to the platinum based drugs. So he is now referring me for a clinical trial.
I don’t know much about this yet but I do know that it will be a more targeted treatment to destroy cancer cells. And hopefully, with less side effects than chemotherapy. As you can imagine, I’ve experienced so many emotions over the past few weeks but I think the overwhelming one has been shock that ovarian cancer has returned. My oncologist said that the cells would have been lying dormant for all these years since I was first diagnosed. They don’t yet know what causes them to activate and grow again. It could have been that my immune system took a hit with the breast cancer treatments and infections, giving the cells a chance to thrive, but that’s just a guess. But no matter what the cause, I can’t believe I’m facing this again!
I am writing this post from the USA where we are visiting our family. The scan showed that the cancer was small enough for my oncologist to agree that I could travel. So in between playing games with my grandchildren, spending time with them on the beach and at the pool, I’ve been focussing on the comforting words of Psalm 139 where it states God has eyes that see everything going on in my life.
‘Lord, you have examined me and you know me.
You know everything I do;
from far away you understand all my thoughts.
You see me, whether I am working or resting;
you know all my actions.
Even before I speak,
you already know what I will say.
You are all around me on every side;
you protect me with your power.
Your knowledge of me is too deep;
it is beyond my understanding.’
This journey continues with God as my guide.
This woman's journey 